Yesterday was a good day. After that realization I had about innocence and enjoying what I did, like I did in childhood. I felt really good. Really peaceful. Really happy and loving towards myself. Something I had not really had. I felt so much love. It was amazing. I felt really good. I felt so clear and at ease with myself and it was amazing.
Life, and my life in particular, has not been an easy journey for me. It has been full of hardships, loss, and lots and lots of anxiety. For a person with an anxious mind we have a tendency to fixate on things and they end up burrowing into our minds to the point where we can not stop thinking about them. It’s a curse at times. I can go out into a parking lot after shopping and it remember where I parked. But that time you said something about me, oh I remember that. Life is funny that way. And if you didn’t laugh at life. It would eat you alive.
This was the case for me last night as someone said to be, about not being sure I was being serious or not. For that is also my curse. My humor, while hilariously hilarious, also causes people to think I am not a serious person. Ever. Contrary to my own popular belief. Can you believe that? I know right. Now I have heard this many a time in my life. Yet for some reason, this time it really stuck to me. I’m sure it’s not the first time that’s happened. It’s just now I am more aware of my thoughts and feelings. And instinctively it made me start to feel bad about myself. That there was something wrong with me. I’m not a good person. Etc, etc. It started to just fester and fester into my mind. What is wrong with me? I need to change. Be someone else. On and on it went. I even woke up this morning still thinking about it. The anxious mind. Is a crazy place to be.
I was feeling so good about myself. So at peace with myself. I did not want this to take me back down a path I did not want to be. I did not want this to clog up my energy system and close me down. So I did the only thing I could. I worked to let it go. I sat in meditation and grounded myself and allowed it to let go out of me and into the earth to be recycled. I breathed in loving energies and light, and breathed out negativity. It was really starting to help.
So I then knew I did not want to hold on to it. So I called in the Archangels, Raphael, Michael, Gabriel, and Chamuel. To release it from me and bring back the love into me. While I was meditating and allowing them to work on me, I could feel peace return to me. My mind was getting still and I was calming. I could then, hear their wisdom coming though about this situation. And this is what it was about that they spoke to me.
“Loving our flaws. These flaws and quirks are what makes us unique. What makes us who we are.”
It made me smile, as I understood it now. I understood myself more. I did not have to feel bad about myself. I did not need to reject a part of me. I knew I am unique and I can be proud about that. I can love myself for who I am. And smile. I thanked the Archangels for their wisdom and love. I also thanked those who helped me learn this lesson by playing their part in it all.
I then decided to pull an oracle card for extra wisdom for the day. Today is feast of the Archangels so I pulled from my Archangel Deck, by Doreen Virtue. I pulled Archangel Oracle. He message is right on with what they told me. So I smiled and thanked them once more. I love when things line up that way.
This post is different than what I normally post about but I could not leave out a part of it. Its message needed to be shared. And I am just the messenger sharing it. We all can be. If we choose to stop and listen.