This weekend was a blast for me. I had a lot of fun. Yet, at the same time, I had thought it would be a scary weekend for me. As I was going to go out of my comfort zone. Big time. Yet, I realized and found out, it was scarier in my head, than it actual was. Much like a trip to the dentists office… But I am getting ahead of myself let me back up some.
This weekend I was asked to participate in a fundraiser for a friends, friend, that is facing an illness, and they asked me if I would be willing to do angel card readings at it. Instinctively I had to say yes. I knew deep down it would be a good opportunity for me to develop and push myself into new places. It is also something I enjoy doing. Of course as the day drew closer and closer, that ego started to come into play, telling me I would not be good enough. I could not do this, and I can’t do this. That guy is quite the brat. Some says I would like to just give him a wedgie, and call him a jerk to his face. Cause he is a jerk, always picking on me. Trying to keep me down. As the days grew closer to this event, I could see how easy it would have been. To just back out. Feign a sickness, run away to Canada. Whatever it would have taken. Now looking back at this I see what would that have accomplished? It would have given me an out, and then that out would have turned into another out at another time, and another time. Eventually that out would become the norm, and I would never do anything. And that smug little jerk would win. Then he would gloat, and have that stupid grin on his face, and say, “victory is mine.” Like he was Stewie Griffin. I was not gonna let this jerk win, I was not going to let him beat me.
Jack Canfield has a great quote, “everything you want is on the other side of fear.” That was my mantra going into this event, as it was so true. The things we want out of life, and what I wanted out of life, was on the other side of fear. I knew, deep within myself, that I needed to work through this fear. I could not let it overpower me, and cause me to run away. Not anymore. I lived my whole life doing that. I was not going to now. Not ever again if I can. I took some deep breaths, and did a quick grounding meditation. Grounded myself to the earth. Grounded myself to my own power. Let all that fear, anxiety, worry, negative talk, go. Let it all go out of me, into my roots I had created through grounding, and into the earth to be transmuted into positive energies. That helped me more than I thought it would. Within minutes I was feeling calm. Relaxed, and ready to face this new adventure. I was ready for this. I let go wondering and worrying about how it would go, and if I could do it. I was free of those thoughts, and I was present. So much so I was able to help my friend who was also doing angel card readings that day relax and know they could do it as well. Positivity spreads and really brings hope to others.
The event was incredible, the energy, the atmosphere, the turnout was great to see. I was able to do those card readings, without fear, and worry, and was able to do well with them. From what I was told from people afterwards. To see the expressions on the peoples faces that I was reading, reminded me, how I love doing what I am doing. Connecting with people like that. Doing those angel card readings. It was such a positive and loving experience for me to finally be doing something I love. Words can not truly express the feelings I felt then and now. To finally be on this path. To finally be moving. To creating so many new and wonderful experiences. All because I followed my passions and worked to make it happen. And did not listen to that little guy in my head trying to tell me I can’t and to just run away. Life is so much better for me now and I look forward to where it will take me next.
I will get the opportunity to do more card readings again this Sunday and now when it comes, I will not be afraid. I will be ready to embrace this adventure and know it’s changing my life just as much as I am changing another’s life.