Defeating ourselves before we try.

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This week has been a “fun” week and I use that term sarcastically if you could not tell. More accurately this has been a tiring week, as well, as a week that had some anxiety to it. This week would see my piloting a new server for work, a job I have been doing for 17 years now. Thank you, I don’t look old enough to have had my job for 17 years. That’s sweet of you to say. 

Yet despite all of that doing things like this have a tendency to just, create some anxious thoughts in my head. Ooooh that brain of ours. Where my head got it into itself that I could not do this project, I would not be good enough at it, I could screw it up, and so forth and so forth. You would think with all those years of experience my brain would see this as another day in the park so to speak. Yet that was not the case this week, as it normally isn’t doing things like this at work. 

That gets me to thinking, what is it, that we fear with things like this? Is it fear of the unknown? Fear of change, and uncertainty that we just can not foresee? Those same fears going to the dentist when we haven’t been there for a long time, stir up within us. Yet each time we survive it, and it’s usually not as scary or bad as we envision it. We know this going in. We know that within a few hours time we will be home and laughing about it, about how easy it ended up being. Yet somehow that fear still stalks us when it comes to something new for us. 

So what does one do when faced with such things in their life. Usually we first think, if I quit my job right now, could I survive without it? Maybe that’s just me? LOL. Many cases we do want to just run away from it and not do it. If we could get away with that. We would certainly take that option more times than not. It’s the “safer” option in our minds. Of course that option prevents us from living our lives. We then let fear consume us and we hide away from it and life. Not living. Just existing. That is not a fun way to live. 

There are other options we can do. Such as planning it out in our heads. Any contingencies we need to perform if need be. That can help. For me, I went in the day before, and installed the piece in place. Since I had no idea what it would be like, I was able to take my time with it before hand and get a feel for it. That actually helped a lot with this. Cutting down on some of the uncertainty involved. 

Other things I did that helped me, was before I left for this, which happened to be 3am, I did some grounding exercises. Grounding as been something I have been making a habit to do more frequently. Grounding helps to keep one centered within themselves, and with the earth. When we are feeling anxious we can not be grounded and can be too much in our heads. Grounding helps us get back down into ourselves, more sturdy, and rooted. Once one is grounding one can take their anxious thoughts, and feeling, and allow them to go out of you, out of your roots you create in grounding, and let it go back into the earth. Believe it or not, that does actually help. The other thing I did, was go connect to Reiki energy. Bringing that healing energy into my body, to charge and being healing within me. Creating a state of harmony and bliss. That worked pretty well and helped me be more calm, more centered, and more serene. 

There are, I am sure, many other things to do. Such as proper deep breathing. This is what I did and it worked surprisingly well for myself today. I was very calm, and confident in myself and my abilities and was able to do what I needed to without being consumed by fear and anxiety. I am thankful for Reiki today. I am still a work in progress but I am getting the tools and the help I need to live a better life. Each day I grow stronger and healthier. 


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