Living with depression

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It’s been about two months since I’ve written anything on this blog, not that I have not done anything in that time. Just have not written anything. If you’re not aware the Facebook page is constantly active. Where I am doing Angel card readings, occasional live FB video, and much more. So give it a like/follow if you’d like to stay on top of things.

This past week we have seen the loss of two prominent people in the world, Kate Spade, and Anthony Bourdain, to suicide. Illustrating just how depression affects everyone regardless of fame, looks, or life. For some they will quickly just say these individuals were cowards, and took the coward way out… But really, that does nothing to help others who are going through their struggles. As one who has been in those shoes, many a time. I will say it’s not as simple as many make it out to be. It’s also the reason who so many who do struggle do so in quite and few around them even know they are going through it. Most of us that have gone through it have not really gotten the support, or we feel we don’t have that support. We feel alone. We feel as though people do not truly understand what we are going through. Many of us are told to just suck it up, you’re overreacting. You need to do this, or that. Get move it. Eventually we feel that we are not being heard. So we shut down to talking to others about it. When in truth as we really may want at times is just a none judgemental ear that just listens. We are venting. We are sad. We are angry. We are frustrated. We are at wits end. We want to be heard. We want to be supported. And above all we don’t want to be told how to feel. When we come to you for advice on what we should do, offer us loving support and guidance. Don’t force us to do what you want us to do. Help us find our ways. Help us to find the light within the darkness. Cause I can tell you, we have lost sight of it. We have lost sight of ourselves. We have lost sight of feeling loved. We have lost sight of feeling appreciated. We lose our sparks of joy within ourselves. And in our worlds. And things start to crumble from there. We are incredibly strong. Yet, we have forgotten that. We have forgotten ourselves.

img_1459Life is hectic. Life is painful at times. And sometimes we can only hold on for so long before we start to really fall apart. Some days all we are looking for is just some love. And a shoulder to cry on. A shoulder to lean on. Mental health and illness has become so taboo and seen as nothing more than a sign of weakness, that people don’t get the help they truly need. Because they are embarrassed and afraid of being judged. So they sit there silently and fight their battles alone. Many times those silent battles that are fought are the ones that can end up getting lost. We have the technology to be so close to everyone in the world, yet we are further apart than we have ever been to each other. Then we start to label ourselves as this, depressed, or anxious. That becomes who society sees us as, and that becomes who we see ourselves as. Those labels become our identities. I was spending my whole life identifying myself as having anxiety. It become who I was. So my life revolved around it. I had to change my life because that’s how I saw myself. Without ever realizing I was so much more than that. It wasn’t what defined me. It was only something I was going through. I don’t even like to say I have anxiety. Because I don’t. I can be anxious, yes. But it’s not something I have. It’s something I may go through. And I can get through to the other side. I have gone through depression. I have gone through suicidal tendencies. But I do not, and will not let that define me as to who I am.

A different mindset can really change our lives and how we see life. Taking us from being victims of life to empowering ourselves to live the best life we can. That is where healing comes into play. Healing of ourselves. Healing of our lives. It’s why I do, what it is, that I do. I help people heal, and change their lives. For some they see healing as curing. Much like with things such as depression. They see, take a pill, and you will be cured. It’s gone. The end. We want that quick cure. That would be nice. Don’t get me wrong. But healing is so much more than that. Because we are so much more than that. Healing is a journey. It is a journey that will span the rest of our lives because our lives are always changing and growing. We are always changing. Things come to an end. Relationships end. Loved ones pass away. New things come into our lives. Time marches forward. Healing helps us to work through it all. Helping to clear our things that hold us down. Things that plague us. Helping us to free ourselves from the wounds that we have. Bad events happen in life, but they do not need to weigh us down. That is where healing comes into play. It helps us to work through it to help release its hold over us. So in time those events will have little energy to us. And we can reclaim our power.

img_1208Healing is about shifting our power/energy back to ourselves. It’s about healing the imbalances within us that has us all over the place within ourselves. It is about finding our centers again, finding that light within ourselves, and finding ourselves again. Many times we end up losing ourselves. Many of us will say, I used to be so different before ____ happened. So we end up losing who we are, and have become who we think we are, most of the time based off of who others told us we were. Healing brings us back to the now so we are not stuck in the past, or living in the future. Healing is about returning us back to those states of grace within ourselves. Helping us to get back to those states before our proverbial falls. Healing is one of the best things we can do for ourselves, and it can, if we allow it, truly change our lives for the better.

Depression/anxiety, affects so many people. And yet, most of those people feel truly alone. There is hope out there. There is paths to better lives. But those paths all go through ourselves. For when we change ourselves. Our worlds start to revolve around us. I’ve sat in those shoes. I’ve been there. I’ve been down. I’ve been so far in the gutter where I begged for this life to be over. To just take a handful of sleeping pills, and to stay sleeping. Yet, three years later, I am so much stronger, so much healthier, and I have done things I never thought I could. I have completely changed my life for the better. This past weekend I had the opportunity to attend a Spirit Gallery with James Van Praagh, and meet him after the show. A three hour show, and an hour drive there. 5 hour total being out, away from home. 5 years ago, I would have thought that was impossible. That I was an anxious person, and anxiety would always dictate my life. I am thankful to know I was completely wrong. That there is hope. There is change out there. And I could live a life that was completely different than I ever saw for myself. I choose to heal myself. I set out to do so. Depression/anxiety does not need to be a life sentence for us. It’s not the ending of us. It’s the beginning of a new life. A better life. It’s our soul’s wake up calls for us to make changes and create a better life. Now, come and join me on the journey of a better life. You will thank me one day.

If you are struggling in life right now, reach out to someone. There are many who are there to help you, and are willing to. Know that you are not alone. There are many support groups to join, or talk to. Don’t think you have to face this alone. If you have thoughts of suicide, confidential help is available for free at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Call 1-800-273-8255. The line is available 24 hours a day, every day.

Much love to you on your journey and in life, and yes, I am rocking a Transformers shirt.

Me and James Van Praagh



2 thoughts on “Living with depression

    EvelynKrieger said:
    June 10, 2018 at 8:40 pm

    I don’t think too many people would call them “cowards”. It is clear that they had everything and still the dark shadow enveloped them until they could not take another moment.


      Healing Life responded:
      June 10, 2018 at 9:49 pm

      Depression doesn’t care who you are, or what you have. It can affect anyone. It can be a heavy burden that some don’t even know people bare.


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