It’s time for me to be healthy again. This is my journey back to that. 2018 has been one crazy year for me health wise. Really it started around this time in 2017. Most of my adult life I have dealt with health issues and sensitivities that created lots of anxieties and fears in being out in public. I had gotten a lot of that under control when I cleaning up my diet. Eliminating things such as processed foods and junk foods, and cutting our foods that I could not tolerate and digest. That made a huge difference in my body and helped to allow me to start getting my life back.
So for two years things were improving for me and then in 2017 I was blindsided with new challenges to face. This time in having inflammation within the body, which caused weight gain and difficulty walking at times. These new health challenges presented new obstacles in my life and caused me to spiral downward. And downward I went. Eating all the foods I knew better. Ice cream, Reese’s Peanut Butter cups, cupcakes. Bread. You name it. I was eating it. And eating it like there was no tomorrow. Consuming two pints of ice cream at a time. 3-4 large bottles of soda a day. I was bottoming out and just did not care much. I went to the er and even to the doctor’s to see if I could figure out what was happening. Blood work came out fine and nothing was really found. Or did I push for more and more testing. I was frustrated and just not happy through it all.
So for me when I got into that state I just did not care what I ate or did. For 6 months I was not doing much. Not really doing the things I loved or enjoyed and was just alone. Which did not help matters. But it’s what I do. My issues, and problems are mine and I face them on my own. The weight of a lot of it, the frustrations in life and my direction and where I was, the health issues I was now facing. Facing it alone was a lot to bare. It was creating new levels of depression within me that I had not seen for years, and even bringing back the anxiety I thought I had tamed. 2018 had started to become one of the hardest emotional/physical years for me since beginning of 2015.
It is through these trials and tribulations that we truly start to find ourselves. Find what we are made of. Find what we are capable of doing . And most times we even surprise ourselves. This year would be no different. While it was a very emotionally demanding year for me. It was also a year of lots of growth and development. As I finished a Shamanism apprenticeship and started to do more healing work on myself and others. It was through those rough times that I started to find a light within myself and light my own path of change and betterment of myself.
So once again I had to make changes in my life. No one else was going to do that for me. If we want something we have to work for it. Many will support and guide us but we ourselves have to work for it. We have to put in the effort and get the balls moving.
So I had to start changing up my diet once again. As luck would have it when trying to clean up my body some I would uncover that there was foods I was consuming that was causing me issues and adding to the inflammation. One of the things I deal with is food sensitivities and allergies to certain trees and grasses. That creates a cross sensitivity to pollens on other foods. Some of the foods I had been eating for 2 years now that I thought were safe for me where not as safe as I once thought. So I had to eliminate them from my diet for now. As I work to heal my body and bring it back to the state it is at and back to a state of better health. Removing those foods really helped cut down on the inflammation I was feeling that was painful, and allowed me to finally be able to get out and exercise. Which was hard before that.
I was not out of the neck of the woods yet. While I was elongating allergen foods I was still consuming quite a bit of junk food on the regular. I was still depressed. And still quite unhappy. There was many nights where I found myself wide awake and not getting much sleep. Or when I did my sleeps were very restless.
It was then I was starting to put two and two together that what I was feeling and facing was a result of the bad foods I was eating. The sugar consumption was taxing on my body and mental state. The foods, the additives were creating depression in me. Where I would be fine until I’d eat them and then those lows would come in. It was the foods that was causing me to stay up late and causing me to have restless nights.
So now I am heading back to the path of better health. I am seeing first hand how these foods affect us so much. Affect our moods. Affect our energy levels. Affect our overall well-being. Now I am working to eliminate those things from my diet to bring my health back to a much more optimal level of being. Which is also helping to lower my levels of anxiety and depression. So as the old saying has always been, “you are what you eat.”
Now it’s time to be healthy again and get back to being me.